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Archive for May, 2007

Astrology in Action

I am on the cusp of Libra, so I often find that when I read my horoscope it is about events just passed. I found Rob Brezsny’s ‘scope to be particularly apt, in relation to the last set of dreams I posted.

“Libra
Do you think you could arrange to drive a car equipped with a jet engine through desert salt flats at 200 miles per hour? Given the current astrological omens, that would be my first recommendation for you. If that’s not possible, would you consider enrolling in circus school and learning how to be safely and elegantly shot out of a cannon? And if neither of those two alternatives are likely, Libra, please somehow stir up a visceral sense of moving speedily toward the future. “

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Went to the carnival today with Kevin. I couldn’t believe it, but Mr. and Mrs. Screech are just going about their business, sleeping the day away in the carousel hut, never mind all the noises and kids running around. I got to look at them for a while and take some more pics. This time I realized just how small they really are.

Dreams:

1. I am standing on the back of an electric wheelchair–one of those ones that weigh a freaking ton. My friend is on the wheelchair too. We are flying through the evening sky, fairly low and fairly slow, but flying on a very heavy wheelchair nonetheless. We are going somewhere–maybe a knitting store, we are having fun.

2. I am with a bunch of people, going over hurdles as we’re being chased. Some of the hurdles are made from earth and living trees. There are birds and some lizards (a salamander, or a gecko?) in the trees. I see some of them as I go over the hurdles. It makes me happy. I half fly, half climb with my hands (like I am braiding roots and vines, not struggling myself over) to get over the hurdles that are 8-9 feet tall. I know that I am dreaming. Instead of waking up in the dream, I want to stay and find out what is going to happen, so I keep going. We are headed towards our very large liftoff/freedom chair. All eight of us will fit on it, blasting into the future, or outerspace, avoiding our pursuers. Coco is already sitting on the chair, next to where I will sit, he is chewing on something, or maybe cleaning his paws. There is a plastic bag in front of him on the ground with his poop in it. Just as I get to the top of the last hurdle I wake up.

I guess I did go on some pretty crazy chairs at the carnival: the spider and, for my first time, a roller coaster. I liked the spider the best. And a large electric wheelchair was a bit of an obstacle at work recently.

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Owl and Turtle

This week’s been a bit of a blur. Actually for a while things have been a bit blurry, from moving a little too fast. I’ve been working (job style) more than ever, which is kind of crazy, but I am getting used to it. Art is still happening, and lots of magic.

First of all, I was so happy to see that in addition to the hummingbirds there are a bunch of swallows living in my hood! I am a huge swallow lover, so very happy about this. For me the swallows are related to joyfulness, and the joyful elimination of pests. Also springtime and hope.

Earlier this week I did a reading with the animal medicine cards. The cards indicated that owl was my strong suit in the issue, but turtle was my downfall. So I thought I would do a little turtle work. I did a turtle exercise from Power Animal Meditations. Then I had a dream where I spoke with my friend Yandariel. She told me that she had done turtle exercises everyday for a week–not just one day, like me. I realized that if I really want to get in touch with the energy, it is probably going to take more than one brief visit to turtle.

I emailed Yandariel about the dream and she wrote back to tell me about the turtle living in her sandbox. She been hanging out with the turtle and feeding him everyday.

I think of the turtle as being associated with slowness, being very grounded and protected–having safety within yourself. Major mother earth connection. I think that in this situation patience is a major issue–with myself and with things out of my control. Also, nurturing myself through the earth would be good. Owl, I think of as being able to see in the dark, clairvoyance and clairaudience. Being in tune with messages/undercurrents. Being able to see the truth in the situation. Guidance to move silently through the quietest things and gain information.

I have been working on a photo of a dream involving owl/chicken owl. It has been going well and it’s fun. Each time I look at owl’s face, I get lost in it. Then yesterday, in the late a.m., I was sitting in the meditation room and I heard “Hoo, hoo, hoo,” like a great horned owl very close. Just once. Hmmm. I do love owl.

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Trancing

Dream: I am with a small group of people. We are inside and it is nighttime. There are other people in the background. I am working on doing some of the journeys from Nicki Scully’s Power Animal Meditations. I am doing them without the drumming. I do some dancing in place like I have read about in The Reluctant Shaman, and I am doing some floating, and feeling floaty and mildly visiony thinking about the animal meditations. The people I am with tell me I can do it without the drumming, but I think I am just faking the experience. I want to try it with the drums.

Probably not really faking the experiences in waking time. Actually the visions of the animals and situations NS describes come through remarkably clearly. I am surprised each time. Still, I feel I might benefit from using drumming and giving more ceremony to the experience.

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I go on a trek looking for Barred Owl. My sister in law has seen one. She tells me there’s one living in the carousel down by Oaks Bottom. She says there are two screech owls 1/4 mile down a trail, in a huge rotted out tree. I don’t know the trail. I go to the carousel but I can’t find Mr. Barred. I don’t see anything in there at all. I think he would be pretty hard to miss. But maybe I’ll check back later. I go and see what excitement might come to me today.

I park my bike by the marsh and it promptly falls over. I leave it there and look at the swallows and herons. I see a red bellied hawk, a vulture and a young eagle. I take my bike and park it by a trail. Maybe I will see this big old tree afterall. I walk the trail and then down to the marsh. I am kind of hidden, it seems like life is closer to me. A young eagle swoops to fish. He flies above me off and on, still carrying his snack. I have a snack. I keep thinking I should check for my cell phone. It’s not there. I think it fell out when my bike fell over. After a while I slowly make my way back to my bike to look for my phone.

I am about to unlock my bike and a lady rides up to me asking if I am Lily. I am. She has my phone. She called my brother and he told her about the owl. She wants to see it. We decide to go back to the carousel. Her boyfriend, Aaron, comes too. When we get there I still can’t see anything. Her boyfriend points out a screech. Here is the screech living in the carousel! The screech flies to the top of the inside. I can barely see, but am so excited. I want to take a picture, but it is way too dark. A carni comes up to us. He takes us behind the locked gate and shows us where the screech 2 is resting. Not 8 feet away. So excited! I get my picture (thank you owl!) and then we have to leave the gated area. We talk for a little while. They are friends of birds and from the midwest, too. What a strange path to take to meet the owl.

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I’ve been really enjoying my new nest. I am not seeing as many hawks and bald eagles in Portland. Still, my new place is nest high, I look out on the trees and get to see lots of birdies passing by. In particular hummingbirds, crows, pigeons, little brown birds, extra small birds (not sure who they are yet), and, fairly regularly, a blue heron passes above.

Dream:

I am standing in a garage. There is a lush park across street. There is someone with me–more of a presence than an identity. I am holding a monkey wrench, there are grease stains on the cement floor. I am working on some repairs.

Across the street, out on a tree limb, I see a slightly scruffy gray bird with a spot of yellow. I think “Killdeer”, but it acts like cat, stretching out languidly on its back, holding its head up with its arms. I see a bird flying towards the park. It looks like a blue heron as it flies, but when it lands it is a glorious peacock. Very beautiful and graceful, it’s neck is longer than any pictures I have seen, also it is very tall, maybe four feet–it walks like a dancer. It quickly crosses the street and comes by the garage. It hands out one of its tail feathers to each person quickly and gracefully as it walks by. I think “Dee!”. The feather I am given has two iridescent eyes at the end instead of one. It’s not as pretty as the ones with one big eye, but I know it is very special. The peacock is still walking around by the garage. Right in front of the garage, just to the left of where I am standing, there is a parrot. Its colors are so bright. Red and blue and even a red and white mohawk. The parrot looks up at me sometimes, it’s hopping around like crow and kind of barking. I try to talk with it, using its noises, but I don’t seem to be getting through. Still it’s wonderful to see.

Killdeer/Catbird: This gray and yellow bird reminds me a little of this checkout guy at the grocery store, because of a common gray mohawk. The checkout guy was a pleasant surprise for a couple reasons: 1. he was in his 50’s or 60’s and had a floppy gray mohawk. 2. he called me Ms. Michaud and pronounced my last name correctly (definitely a rarity). The bird also reminds me of Kevin. Also an owner of a floppy gray mohawk. Plus the languid, stretch out position was a Kevin classic. Kevin is also very cat like, good at sharing the message of the importance of relaxing.

Peacock Dee: In the dream I associate the Peacock with my longtime friend Dee. She is always very generous, so I often associate her with Turkey, aka Mr. Giveaway. But she does have a huge tattoo of a peacock on her thigh, and a sense of style more akin to peacock than turkey.

Crowco the Parrot: The parrot reminds me of crows in my neighborhood, but also my chihuahua, Coco. He’s so bright and funny and needy. I try to communicate with him, and sometimes it works to talk, usually it works a lot better to send pictures to him. I talk a lot to the crows in my neighborhood. They look at me curiously, but I don’t really know if there is a connection.

As for the repair work: Yesterday I was doing some interior work/healing with crystals, and a couple different energies came to me: ruby, a quartz wand, emerald and lapis. This is how I associate these energies with the dream: The ruby reminds me of the red, fiery, mars energy of Coco, who’s always ready for the attack. The quartz wand seems associated with Kevin who is good at focusing energy, and also the tree branch, which also sends out energy like a wand, but is much bigger than its operator (the catbird). The emerald and lapis are colors of the peacock’s feathers, and my feather had two eyes instead of the usual one. I associate emerald with heart chakra, pure love and giving in a balanced way, the lapis I associate with purifying/the fifth chakra and grace. I also see Dee as an example of healthy generosity and loving.

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Yesterday and today I saw hummingbird! First time to see here in Portland, but I had heard they were around. I saw one buzzing around the tree directly out my front window. Then, today, I was up on top of the garage and saw two hummingbirds in my neighbors yard. They then flew over the garage I was standing on to another tree. The light was right and they were pretty close, so I got to see their colors. Very pretty iridescent marine blue and green colors. Just like in my dream that I had shortly after moving to Portland! It was so nice to see them, especially because they are associated with aesthetics, beauty, and joy. I think of them as good omens for art (oh, and life).

On a different note:

Dream (a couple days ago): I find out that Kevin has had sex with two women, one of them a friend of mine. At first I am not too reactive about it, like normal for me. Then I talk to Kevin about it at some party and he just kind of acts like its no big deal. I become very enraged and scream many things at him. It’s nighttime in Iowa City. I decide I need to take a run to cool down. I run down Dodge St. for several blocks. I get to a big street and have to slow down. Across the street I see some people walking a great dane. The dog is using those shoes that look like athletic shoes, but have rollers on the bottom.

This dream isn’t exactly my typical flight dream, however it really stuck with me for a couple reasons. When I got angry I was able to scream (loudly and freely) in dreamtime. Also I was able to run, way better than I can in “real life”, for that matter. This was a heat induced nightmare that I was very glad to wake up from. But still it’s left me contemplating anger and how it could be used to positively affect my energy and (waking) dream situation.

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